five minutes A day (2)

Hi. It’s day two of writing five minutes a day. I gave in to self-care and went up to lie down. I read and then napped, then read some more. This is the gem I found:

“You must make your heart like an empty instrument so that the spirit of God can blow through you. Any blockage at all will prevent the making of this divine music. Even something that is traditionally considered good and worthy can constitute a blockage of knowledge, for instance. What is required is a certain emptiness, or quietness of mind.”– Sigal Samuel, The Mystics of Mile End

What does my vessel contain? Do I not know words for it? Am I simply afraid to look? To get it out onto paper, into concrete form? Attempting this, to me, has BEEN one of those blocks (I think.)

Other things come first, like let’s eat this delicious shredded chicken, strawberry chick pea salad NOW, taste, input, passion! This is light in my experience, and yet I check over my shoulder for that thing I gave up, or missed, or blocked, like the above quote. This last sentence has me sad, like yesterday, both and all joys squashed into which is right, what is the right thing to do. Maybe all of it is ME Being. Do I carry being in All things? Am I being?

five minutes A day (1)

I am doing what Augusten Burroughs spoke of in his facebook video:https://www.facebook.com/9837529851/videos/2542364189313945

Writing for five minutes. Using hands idea has come to me for the last few days over and over. So, I decided to follow the direction. This morning, I pulled cards from the Mystical Shaman oracle. I thought I’d get all fancy, which is NOT what Augusten suggested, and write about the cards. I did get neat cards, but immediately I got more entrenched in the idea that what I might think and what comes out of the typing fingers will not only not be enough, but something BAD would happen. I am laughing to myself about it now. However, the feeling of panic nearly matches that feeling before being hit or hurt as a child. The powerlessness that happens after one is shoved off of a cliff is overwhelming and can run over everything I want to think and to do!. (3.5 minute mark!) So, poking about and feeding my joy, I ran into a quote on Pinterest that says, “Wisdom begins in wonder.” a quote from Socrates. It IS wonder and enchantment that sparks me to take the two hands and to begin, to create, to make manifest what comes from above and below into the world. Somewhere in there, sometimes, I stop. The stopping smothers the sunlight of my spirit. Well, I hold a belief that it does. I cannot see how holding that belief gives me any benefit at all. I’m just going to sit with that for now.

The morning cards about doing this five minutes A day practice were:
Jaguar 28, The Andean Cross 2, Earth 17, and Eagle 16

Morning Trip (338)

“Patience doesn’t mean making a pact with the devil of denial, ignoring our emotions and aspirations. It means being wholeheartedly engaged in the process that’s unfolding, rather than ripping open a budding flower or demanding a caterpillar hurry up and get that chrysalis stage over with.”
–Sharon Salzberg

Morning Trip (337)

“How can the divine Oneness be seen?
In beautiful forms, breathtaking wonders, awe-inspiring miracles?
The Tao is not obliged to present itself in this way.
If you are willing to be lived by it, you will see it
everywhere, even in the most ordinary things.”

–Hua Hu Ching, taken from The Essence of TAO by Pamela Ball

Morning Trip (335)

“If you were to take negative emotions away from people, they would simply collapse and go up in smoke. What would happen to what we call art, theater, drama, to most novels? In the emotional center there is no natural negative part, the greater part of negative emotions are artificial, they are based on instinctive emotions which are transformed by petty imagination and identification (losing self in an object). Positive emotions are emotions which cannot become negative. But all our pleasant emotions such as joy, affection, can, at any moment, turn to boredom, irritation, envy at the slightest provocation, or even without provocation. So we can say that we can have no positive emotions. At the same time we can say that we have no negative emotions without identification and imagination.”
–Peter Ouspensky

Morning Trip (334)

“The feeling of being hurried is not usually the result of living a full life and having no time. It is on the contrary born of a vague fear that we are wasting our life. When we do not do the one thing we ought to do, we have no time for anything else – we are the busiest people in the world.”
–Eric Hoffer