“Inspiration is there all the time.
For everyone whose mind is not clouded over with thoughts, whether
they realize it or not…
Inspiration is pervasive but not a power.
It is a peaceful thing.
It is a consolation even to plants and animals.”
–Agnes Martin
“They may deny it vociferously, but artists burn with a need to convey by implication their personal conception of life and potential beauty, transcending all the laws, dogmas, practical aspirations, and the instincts of self-preservation. They, along with the scientists, poets, and philosophers, illuminate the world rather than exploit it….”
–Ansel Adams
CREATE! DANCE! CREATE! DANCE! CREATE!
Gooood Energy!
Thinking about eating that elephant one bite at a time 😉 Thank you!
Woooooooooooooo Hooooooooooooooo! Boink!
I really cherish the multitude of exposure to new perceptions in the literary and visual loot that I stumble upon during my trek at WordPress. But, for now, my computer has died and I will not be able to post and to visit, in the way that I have done for quite a while. When the computer is broken, I typically feel angst, as it is my social connection with other people AND stimulation and organization for a mind that, to be well organized, requires vast amounts of input.
I have tried to get myself to a computer at other times when it has been simply ill, and I tend to get upset and have a resentment over the process. My photographs and writing are all, often stored on my hard-drive. If I have a creative spurt while on a gratefully computer, I have no place to place it. This is viewed and felt as restrictive to me and can change my entire outlook.
Of late, real life here, around the creative has feel stifled and awful. Some days the physical body agrees with that assessment, which was even more ew. I am glad to be released from a hovering maybe about the when the computer would die, something on the motherboard was leaking and fans were broken and even the switch wished to rest.
Instead of focusing upon sorrow or stifle, I’d rather continue to work on clearing out my own person clutter, material, metaphysical, and otherwise. The lose of the computer has somehow aided this. I have no excuse that I MUST simply sit down and check or engage or create. Parts of me cannot use this positive conversion of what might not be going well in life in order to get rid of nor to hide bad feelings. To hide that I have a life on life’s terms, no matter how far I’ve come in my thinking, and how far I have yet to go. What happens when being spiritual means a self imposed ideal that involves perfection? What happens when a bad thing occurs and I want to cry or to rage, to act out on a defect of my character, instead of working out the next right thing to do when all around seem not to notice nor to care for their own side of the street? I feel like I’m rationalizing being abused. I KNOW, that I’m only cleaning and changing what I can, but the result can be that I appear like a doormat. When I expand to allow and to encompass other’s being just where they are…well that can just become clutter and be bad for me. So, I’ll be working on that. Again! 😀
This starting point, ending point sort of thinking does help one to amass what is required to get to a destination, but more always comes after. Perhaps the job is done when we die…and even more fun, I think it continues after we die!
So, happy travels, I haven’t forgotten any of you, that I know of, and if I do, I do my best to make up for it, even if I do not tell you so. I’ll be back if God sees fit to decide to provide me another computer, when He is finished with the current items He’s offered to me.
This morning I am burbling along. This is good! I promise! Well, unless one is the stodgy sort and thinks that being stony is all that there is. But I will just giggle and flow right over that stone. Win win situation!
I haven’t been writing. I have been experiencing things for which there are no words. Or, more likely the expression is ‘stuck’. If I type that I listened to water, you cannot see it and hear it and smell it as I did in that one space. I want to share that moment and I want to take part in those moments of experience of others so that I see and feel the way of another. How do I know that water moving does not trigger energy flowing across ones skin? How do I know the why and how of one who does NOT feel such a thing, but smells it instead. (the energy, not the water itself)
How do I bypass a judgement of sorts, one of feeling sorry for those who cannot experience as I do? Are they missing something? Am I bored with simple and flat? Why? How can the other not seek these things out? Not notice what I term dead? Is it right of me to term it dead? Can a person’s spirit miss what it does not know what it has?
How will I know if I do not ask? Try on another skin? How do I get past this? I can tend to feel trapped or bored, I think, within a not-feeling, not expressing. How do I know when there is truly a nothing there? How will I notice those things outside of my own experience? I am quite sure that is a sure bet–that I am and will miss them too!
And then, the trees! (You thought I was off on an excited expressive tangent and that I hadn’t clearly pointed out the blogs relation to the title didn’t you?) I detest winter. still. shrugs.
The trees often do not even talk in the wind. Though, I did notice it this year, it just has a different tone and I have to shift state a bit to get it clearly. They are just there. One cannot tell which tree is dead and which will be in full leaf come spring and summer. Yesterday waaaaaaaaay up the trees were talking! And I listened and I had to reach because these were so tall and it was faint and I got there and…
Glorious purple buds!!! Glorious chartreuse buds!! I could seeeeeeeee the life with my eyes!!! I needed proof about this thing, in this way! This allowed me to notice tiny life alllllll around. A key in my lock! And I thought of ‘those people’ that I frown at for needing proof. Five steps back for every one forward. AND I AM ONE OF THEM!!! This made me very very happy! I can understand! Now, will it stick for longer than a minute (the other end of this issue, the stick of concept and experience long past an AH HA moment)
So, off I go to experience!
“There is a vitality, a life force,
a quickening that is translated through you into action,
and because there is only one of you in all time, this expression is unique.
If you block it, it will never exist through any other medium and be lost.
The world will not have it.
It is not your business to determine how good it is;
nor how valuable it is; nor how it compares with other expressions.
It is your business to keep it yours clearly and directly, to keep the channel open.
You do not even have to believe in yourself or your work.
You merely have to keep open and aware directly to the urges that motivate you.
Keep the channel open.
No artist is pleased . . .
There is no satisfaction whatever at any time.
There is only a queer, divine dissatisfaction;
a blessed unrest that keeps us marching and makes us more alive than the others.”
– Martha Graham
Elisa's Spot 